When my children knocked on my door
Bearing the gift of unrehearsed motherhood
In their soft skin, I let them in.
The motherhood came without instructions
But with a bayonet on one side
And a sword on the other,
She cleared away debris on the path
Left behind the war
Holding an umbrella over us
In rain and harsh sunlight.
Sky was cerulean blue,
Water was crystal clear in trade winds,
And she rode her own cumulus cloud of freedom
Jousting endless debates on frayed edges
Of philosophical meanings
Of her own beliefs.
No need to be war ready,
The Cold War was somewhere in unmarked lands,
The distance guaranteed the safety
Of the shining pearls with soft skins
And babbling voices.
Motherhood like mother of pearl
Is invincible and boundless
Mending shortcomings of the past,
Making music like Ravel’s Bolero
In continual crescendo,
No one leaves, all marching in the dream beats.
Unlike the Bolero, the motherhood descends,
Unlike shining pearls, the motherhood dulls.
I wish I could collect all the tears I have shed
To fill the moat around the castle in the air.
The Year of Rat